Much of what we do now, how and why we do it, came from our own personal experiences. To date, I have yet to find a married with children BDSM book of any kind other than fictional erotica. The books were pretty much BDSM how-to manuals. Though I am certainly no expert in this matter I quickly realized that there is no meaningful reference to married couples in any of these books. The three books listed below were the first books that I read about the lifestyle.ġ) SM101: A realistic Introduction – Wiseman, Jayģ) The New Topping Book – Easton, Dossie Hardy, Janet w. There are a lot of great books out there to read. I have read a lot and learned a lot about the lifestyle already. Taking our D/s relationship outside of our bedroom and more into our everyday life proved difficult but also proved the most rewarding. We had young children in the house and we were “in the closet” when it came to friends or family as well. After much soul-searching we decided to introduce the lifestyle outside of the bedroom and into our everyday lives. Initially, my wife was submissive only in the bedroom. When beginning a journey without a solid foundation, every single step becomes a difficult decision. How can I now dominate her? How does this fit into our everyday life? Where does it begin and where does it end? Am I pushing her? Does she even want to be pushed? This is the woman who I have cherished and placed on a pedestal for so many years. The reality however, of making it happen in everyday real life became much more challenging. When talking about it, the lifestyle seemed simple.

When at work, I am what you would consider the “leader”. In fact, I have a strong dominant personality both in my personal life and in my profession. These feelings weren’t necessarily about my ability as a leader. Some of my feelings, if I were to be completely honest, were of insecurities and doubt. There were some things that I needed to figure out on my own.Īs a long-time married, loving husband becoming a Dominant has proven to have its challenges. If some of my inner most thoughts were revealed, it may diminish my dominance over her. After my second entry on her website I soon realized that I couldn’t continue. The theory was to be completely open and honest about everything that we were experiencing along the way.

The original idea was not for consumption by others but rather to archive our own journey, a living journal. Initially my wife and I began a blog together to document our individual points of view throughout our journey.

Sm101 book